Prepare Yourself

I have a game for you, a game that you play on your computer but has real life consequences. It will be a game where you will need to jeopardize your email address, personal information, and probably the livelihood of your computer. However, the rewards are more than worth it. Are you ready for the “Win a Free Insert Trendy Electronics Here Game”?

If you think you’re ready then you need to start at a website that claims to be funny but is actually full of free electronics FUN. Here’s an example. (Don’t mind the porn I blocked out) Right there you can win a free PSP. Omghowisthattrue you ask? Well there’s a catch, are you MAN enough to hit 10 ducks? Apparently Everyfreegift doesn’t think so.

After you’ve won your free PSP by giving away your name, home address, home phone number, cell phone number, mother’s maiden name, social security number, passport, driver’s license number, your place of birth, your ATM pin, your bank account number, credit and debit card numbers, the VIN number on your car, and your IP and MAC addresses feel free to head over here for your next electronic. Oh, and don’t mind those popups or slow computer speed you may be experiencing, it’s just your computer reacting to how awesome you are for shooting the ten ducks.

Here you find ebaumsworld is giving away 10 free ringtones and all you have to do is rid their homepage of that pesky duck that’s been flying around. Thanks for the opportunity Eric Bauman! What’s that? A small puff of smoke just came out of the back of your computer and all you can see is a blue screen? That just means that your computer cannot handle how awesome your new ringtones and PSP are and has decided to sacrifice itself to Satan, good work.

Relax though, all is not lost. Thankfully you were greeted with this offer as you left ebaumsworld.com. So you can now use your free laptop to get yourself that iPod you’ve been chasing after. Getting your iPod is very simple; just register and send emails to everyone you know asking them to sign up for Maxim and Stuff Magazine subscriptions. It’s only $19.99 for the whole year. And once they sign up, they have to get three of their friends to subscribe and after FreeIpods can made a few thousand dollars off subscriptions (and a few thousand more from selling your personal information to advertising companies who specialize in spam and popups) you’ll get your mp3 player. Don’t worry about alienating your friends and family by mailing them advertisements that can lead to identity theft, you won’t need them once you get your hands on that iPod.